Halloween

S2:E3 Tales We Won’t Tell at Night

JoeRover Dogboy Chronicles, Season 2 , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Good reader specific time frame, all you spooks and specters of the Internet. My name is the Bonekeeper. I unearth all the tales that should remain rotting within the hallow walls of the Storybook Graveyard. Today, I’ve dug up a delightfully delicious treat just for you. Sit back, turn off the lights, and gnaw on this bone of a tale.

Suzie, cheerleading captain and favorite for homecoming queen, walked home late one night after a victorious basketball game. The winds whispered and the fall leaves danced. Suzie smiled to herself knowing that tomorrow the victory would be coupled with her favorite day of the school year: picture day.

She abruptly stopped. A leftover instinct from primeval times gripped at her gut like bad sushi. She was being watched.

“Whoever this is,” she said in a voice trying to be strong, “this isn’t funny. Trying to scare someone is so 1980s horror film.”

She paused and listened. The only sound was the beating of her own heart.

There was no sound, no movement, yet she felt the Presence moving closer to her.

Closer and closer.

Fear wrapped around her like a hungry snake. She felt as stiff as a corpse as the Presence grew closer. She wanted to run, to scream, but the horror held her still.

The Presence loomed over her with the Chill of Death. She did not want to turn and face the terror, but she turned nonetheless. It was as if the Presence commanded her movements. She felt void of will. The Presence demanded attention, and she could do nothing but oblige.

The form of her stalker focused in from the eternal night. It was a humanoid figure with a giant mirror for a head.

Suzie screamed, a sound that some say still haunts the town to this day. For in the mirror, Suzie saw…she had a pimple.

Well frightful fiends of the digital age, that concludes today’s bone-chilling tale. Join me next time for another stroll through the Storybook Graveyard; we’ll see what other undying tales we can dig up. But be warned, brave reader, some tales are best left untold.

Aah-hahahahahaha!!

The Slime (A Halloween Poem)

JoeRover poetry , , , , , , , , , ,

It just wouldn’t be Halloween without a “The Raven” by Edgar Allan Poe inspired/parodied poem.

Once upon a midday bleak and boring,

While I exercised, only thoughts in that hour,

There came a knocking at my spaceship door.

“How is that possible?” I wondered.

“Was an asteroid and nothing more.”

Oh, asteroid, I cursed my wandering.

Sweet, forgiving Luna, my dear.

Who during EVA was impaled by space debris.

My loneliness wrapped around memories of bright Luna.

Still, I hear her voiceless scream

Through that endless midnight doom.

Again, again came the knocking on my spaceship door.

In a beep, the sensors say life is by the ship’s sterile hide.

“Luna? Could it be?

Could Providence have saved my love?”

In a rush, the airlock I fling.

Alarms wail but my Luna waits!

But nothing save a slime flies in.

It comes to rest upon kitchen floor.

Quote the slime, “Give me air!”

A slime with voice?

A pack I provide.

Breath after breath, the green slime takes

All while watching me.

“How is this? Who are you?” I say.

The slime stares then pass a beat,

Quote the slime,

“I saw it all.”

“All?” I ask.

“The fight with Luna,

Vicious and with bite.”

“Nonsense!” quote I. “Leave now, vile slime!

Dear Luna had no spite!”

The slime replied with red gelatin shiver.

“What evil do you speak?” I yell.

No reply ‘cept puffs of air.

“My Luna is innocent. Sweet as a babe.

No evil in her might.”

“Not her, but you,” spoke the dying slime.

“Angered by her night with Steve.

The line snapped by your very hand.”

No, no. A rock. A rock did in my love!

Not the bitter affair with wife and friend!

Where was Steve at the end?

I gripped the slime,

But laugh it did, as it dripped away.

The slime, red stain and broken pack,

Left me alone on kitchen floor…

Forevermore.

Until the next wormhole…Happy Halloween!!

Halloween Tip: Beware the Asset Hunters

JoeRover Short Tails , , , , , , , , , ,

Though the abduction, mind-wipe, and will-manipulation of people, places, and things has largely been outlawed throughout the Omniverse, there are still those, Asset Hunters, who capture and sell beings on the Black Market. These “assets” are then used in video games as characters, props, or settings.

With the decrease in asset hunting, a vacuum was formed thus allowing some Paradox Prisoners to be reborn as cyber-realm assets. 

Dashing Heroes and Exciting Sci-Fi/Fantasy Action Await You in the Dogboy Multiverse

A peaceful drive turns into a road rage battle as Joe and Bandit defend themselves against Roadburn and Skidz. During the fight, Joe meets the mysterious Leo. Who is this young man? What do Roadburn and Skidz want with him?

Leo the Snake Charmer

Monsters Defined

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“Monster” is given to anyone or anything that is non-canon/fan-made. Monster hunters see them as anomalies since they believe they “have no soul” and seek to destroy them.

Science Fiction, Fantasy, and Adventure. What More Could You Want?

The name is Joe Rover. Gamer. Writer. Superhero. With the help of my friends, I protect Megaton City from all sorts of villains whose only desire is chaos & destruction. 

The Adventure Begins Here

What Causes a Paradox?

JoeRover Short Tails , , , , , , , ,

What causes a paradox?

One is a new timeline. The other is caused by fan-made events.

Fan-made events both exist and don’t exist. The fan gives life to the event, but the event isn’t official/canon. The event becomes a paradox or anomaly. Monster hunters then seek to destroy it.

Science Fiction, Fantasy, and Adventure. What More Could You Want?

The name is Joe Rover. Gamer. Writer. Superhero. With the help of my friends, I protect Megaton City from all sorts of villains whose only desire is chaos & destruction. 

The Adventure Begins Here

The Terror of Night Dad | Halloween Special

JoeRover Dogboy Chronicles, Side Quests , , , , , , , , , ,

Vincent Tyler wanted nothing more than to be a father. Except he couldn’t have children. His grief, and possible madness, became so strong that one day he unlocked superpowers. He delve even further into madness by deciding to use those talents to protect the innocent. Vincent Tyler would remain a accountant during the day; but at night, he would transform into the terror of the underworld, Night Dad.

As Night Dad, Vincent possessed the power to persuade the guilty to do as he wanted by using his “dad voice.” He also knew how to embarrass a criminal and share this weakness with all present. His last talent is the ability to inflict pain through his cringey “dad jokes.”

Night Dad stalks the shadows in his white shirt and green sweater vest. So, be on the look out for his Number One Dad hat and listen for the soft whipping noise of his blue tie blowing in the wind. If he catches you…he’ll remove his belt and…

“WHACK!!”

The villains jerked back in fear and gasped in terror.

The storyteller’s eyes took in the sight of the gathered fearful fiends with morbid glee. General Destruction chuckled to himself.

Rat Fink nervously thumbed his fingers; sweat dripped down his long nose and into his whiskers. The whiskers bobbed up and down as the sweat fell off and down to the floor. “Has this guy never heard of adoption?”

Until the next wormhole…thanks for reading.

Copyright 2020 Joe Rover. All rights reserved.

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Recommended #36 | Halloween Edition

JoeRover Recommended , , , , , , , , , ,

The following are my opinion and do not reflect the opinion of any organization or person.

Here are some spooooky recommendations for Halloween. Happy tricks and treats.

I, of course, have to start off with the Halloween anthology book that I have a story in.

Hush: Anthology by Earnest Writes

Now that the shameless self promotion is out of the way, here’s the rest of the list.

Playing SPOOOOOPY Songs In Beat Saber… by Tempex

LUIGI’S MANSION 3 Gameplay Walkthrough Part 1 – FULL GAME (Nintendo Switch) by GhostRobo

🎃 CARVING the 7 DEADLY SINS on Pumpkins! 👻 *spooky* by Jazza

Slumber Parties Are Witch Gatherings by Let Me Explain Studios

The Lost World | DCEASED #6 Review (FINAL ISSUE, SPOILERS) by Fortress of Solitude

FNAF VR’s DREAD-ful New Game! | Curse of Dreadbear (FNAF VR Help Wanted DLC) by GTLive

Do you have any recommendations? Tell me in the comments.

Until the next wormhole…thanks for reading.

The Herobrine Exists Theory

JoeRover theories , , , , , ,

With the revival of Minecraft, there comes many new videos and theories about the game’s hidden lore. The YouTube channel The Game Theorists is just one of those looking into various theories.

It is pretty obvious that some kind of civilization existed before you (the player) arrived. There are ruined structures, like the temples and the strongholds. And it seems that civilization is trying to start up again, hence the villagers.

With it being October, I plan to tell a ghost story–a Minecraft ghost story. You guess it. It’s a theory about Herobrine. (Not that big of a surprise since it was in the title.)

Supposedly, Herobrine is a mob or something that appears in worlds at random. He is always seen from a distance and vanishes. He looks like the default Steve character, except for glowing eyes. Some believe him to be a ghost or a glitch in the game code. But, maybe, he’s supposed to be there.

Maybe, he’s one of the ancient builders.

Obviously, something happened to the previous builders. What it was is up for debate. The Game Theorists say that the builders accidentally unleashed the Wither; they couldn’t beat it so they had to retreat to strongholds. They then evacuated to the End.

However it happened, the point remains that they had portal technology. They could go to the Nether or to the End. What if there was a lab accident while working on the prototype? And let’s say a guy who looks like Steve is caught in the blast. He is then trapped between worlds, blinking in and out. Maybe Herobrine is just trapped.

Or Herobrine could be something even more. Maybe he knew that their civilization was dying but wanted to warn the next one so he made a time machine, but it malfunctioned and he is phasing in and out of time. Wouldn’t that be something if he was a messenger trying to prevent history from repeating itself?

So next time you hear a story about someone seeing Herobrine, don’t laugh because it just might be some lost soul.

Happy Halloween.

Until the next wormhole…thanks for reading.

The Beast of Camp TimberWolf is now available for preorder. It releases Oct. 22, 2019. If you’re a fan of action, adventure, an science fiction-fantasy, buy the latest Dogboy Chronicles story now.

Tricks and Treats

JoeRover Odds and Ends , , , , , , ,

Happy Halloween all you Internet pumpkins. My plans this year involve watching scary movies and eating candy till I puke (which at my age is like one Snickers bar). But, here’s a list of Halloween tricks and treats you might enjoy. Stay safe and have fun.

  • 1. Fang and Claw by @GlennKoerner (an anthology)
  • 2. Tricks No Treats by @Cal1018
  • 3. Trick-or-Treat Man by @SebJenkins & @arielklontz (comes with an alternate ending by each author)
  • 4. The Last Vampire by @JEHallows (ongoing story)
  • 5. A Tale for Halloween by Colin Garrow, free at most online retailers
  • 6. An EVO murder mystery, Minecraft YouTubers Netty Plays, SystemZee, Solidarity, and others are invited to dinner at a mansion
  • 7. “How to Beat Michael Myers” by The Flim Theorists
  • 8. “Pumpkin Girl: An Animated Horror Story” by itsAlexClark
  • 9. “10 Scariest Piston Doors in Minecraft” by Mumbo Jumbo
  • 10. Disney’s Hocus Pocus
  • 11. The Haunting in Connecticut
  • 12. Garfield’s Halloween Adventure
  • 13. And because this is my list, my own collection of scary stories Tails from the Fallen Worlds

    • Fear the Skeeter | COW Oct 19

    JoeRover Odds and Ends , , , , ,

    Welcome to another “Confessions of a Writer” (or COW for short–FYI, I totally didn’t plan it to work out like that, maybe it should be COAW).

    Halloween continues to inch closer. And then the real horror begins…National Novel Writing Month (but that’s a post for another day). This post is about Halloween and how every year it makes my thoughts weirder than normal. Take this one that woke me up at the Witching Hour this morning.

    I woke up thinking about all the bloodsucking and/or biting creatures of the night. We’ve got vampires, zombies, werewolves, and even more. They all turn you into one of them with their bit or scratch. Suddenly, I became very thankful that mosquitos are not on that list. Could you imagine if that happened? You get bit by a mosquito and you become one! We’d have shows like The Walking Skeeter (though flying could work I suppose). And a half human-half mosquito creature…*shivers.*

    So, what do you think would be the most disturbing thing people could turn into thanks to a bite? What would be the most hilarious? What would be the weirdest? Personally, I think a banana. That’d just be weird if people started to turn into bananas. I’m not sure how a banana would bite someone, but then again there have been killer tomatoes.

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