Kitty on the Prowl

“Ladies and gentlemen,” said the host of the Back Alley Club, “Miss Sasha La Purr!”

The cats clapped their paws; the dogs howled; and the birds whistled while the host left the stage. A spotlight appeared at stage left. A leg with white fur and long-heeled shoes peeked out from the exit/entrance. The crowd hollered louder. Miss La Purr, a white cat with some black stripes along the face, slowly entered the stage. She walked slowly to the microphone letting each new howl and whistle wash over her. She gripped the microphone. Finally, the crowd faded into silence. She nodded softly to the band of mice. The saxophone player began with a soft, slow tune. Soon the others joined in creating a playfully romantic song.

“You think I’m cute. But, honey, I’ve got claws and teeth to boot.

Don’t be fooled when I’m on the prowl…boys.

A sway of my hips, and a bat of my eyes, 

my attacks are neigh when the moon is high.

Perfume in the air beckons you to come near. Ruby red lips that hold your gaze.

You’ll never see it coming when I’m on the prowl.

Your soul I’ll steal with a ‘purr’ and a “hmm.’

A tail around your throat, and a gentle squeeze.

When I’m on the prowl, I always win.

Slashes and yowls are fine for some, but 

there are other ways to skin a cat.”

The audience whistled as Miss La Purr slinked off the stage; she winked at a patron sitting by himself.

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Song and Dance Very Routine

Song and Dance Very Routine (Side Quests, #1)

“Listen up people,” said Director Silverfish. “Our intel suggests a transbeing is at the Newton City Zoo. You leave in ten.”

“Let’s go, Ace.” Field Commander John Watermark shoved me along.

“I’m going?” I asked. “I’m not sure about that.”

He put his hands on his hips and then did something really unexpected: he began to sing:

Listen now, BOY.

I said I’d help you find your father

Let Richter continue his research

He pointed to his chest.

As long as you were help to me.

He shoved me backwards.

This is part of the deal.

He started jabbing his finger into my chest.

You will be trained.

And God willing you will help us defeat White Hat.

Now suit up and that…is…that.

He spun around as doors opened and I saw an enormous airship. An automatic walkway started carrying John, David Windmaker (my handler), and me towards some kind of ship’s bridge. Below us, the troops were gearing up. They stomped their feet as they marched down the line. As they moved a lieutenant slapped a weapon into the soldier’s hands and they would move on freeing space for another. As John, David, and I passed high above them, the stomp-slap became rhythmic: stomp, slap, stomp, slap.

Suddenly one soldier began to sing.

We’re off once more.

The rest of the troops replied in harmonic grunt: Prepare.

The solo soldier continued: There’s always something down the next corr-i-dor.

Troops: Suit up.

Solo soldier: Say your good-byes, make your plans because we just might die.

Troops: Here we goooo!

The ship began to lift off. The hanger doors began to open above us.

“Isn’t this ship a little noticeable?” I asked John.

“We have cloaking technology given to us by our alien allies. Now shush.”

The soldiers continued their stomp-slap. I then could hear David start to sing:

For God and Country,

We protect the innocent.

The people would not under-stand.

The shadows must be our home.

David began climbing a ladder to a roof hatch. The soldiers began to dance and sing about the impending mission. The singing was more like background singing. And David sang on:

Does it have to be this way?

I see an end to shadows

When fear and distrust are in the past.

I look to a future in the sun

When death and secrets are far be-hind.

David was now on the roof. He began twirling around some pole as the soldiers’ song began to increase.

Some DAY! All this will be done.

Mankind will know the truth.

Oh, that happy DAY!

Secrets, lies, shadows are no more.

How I wish to see that DAY!

He then hung his head.

But for n-oow, I must lurk behind these walls.

Hoping, dreaming of that special daaaayyy…

David held his arms out towards the sun as he held the final note.

I turned to John. “Is this, uh, normal?”

“You have no idea.”

The door opened and a soldier ran in; he looked around as David climbed back down. “Aww, I missed the musical number?” He kicked at the ground. “Shoot.” He opened the door and left.

O-kaaay… I thought.

“A few months ago a witch cursed the troops to suddenly break into song,” said John. John looked out over the troops; he put his hand to the glass. “I will find a cure.”

I rubbed the back of my neck. “Well…as curses go, it doesn’t seem so bad.”

John scoffed. “You really have a lot to learn.”

Copyright © 2016 by Joe Rover

All rights reserved. No part of this story/post may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without prior written permission of the author/publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in reviews. Author can be contacted on Twitter @JoeRover2.

All characters, organizations, and locations in this story/post have no existence outside the imagination of the author and have no relation to anyone bearing the same name or names. Any resemblance to individuals known or unknown to the author are purely coincidental.