Poké-man Theory | Ponder This

It seems like everyone and their Growlithe has a theory as to why Ash doesn’t age. I’ve heard everything from “Ash is in a coma” to “Team Rocket is in purgatory” to “Ash’s age is equal to his level.” So with the release of Detective Pickachu, I’m going to wander through the tall grass and catch myself a theory.

Wild Theory Appears

The reason Ash doesn’t age is similar to the theory that in the Pokèmon universe age is the same a level. The theory states that Ash is not 10 years old–in the way we think of age; he is level 10. So going from this theory (plus the one saying that humans are Pokèmon), the reason why Ash doesn’t age is because he hasn’t leveled up enough to evolve. We’ve seen how Pokèmon will evolve from babies to children to adults–with some having a middle/teenage evolution.

For example, Charmander could be the childhood version of Charizard with Charmeleon as the teenage version. (I guess some Pokèmon are lucky enough to not have to go through those awkward teenage years.)

So Ash looks ten because he’s in his childhood evolution. He could really be 18 in our years but only look ten. Pikachu has been with him for years and he (or is Pikachu a she) hasn’t “aged” either.

This theory makes sense because…let’s face it, Ash isn’t the sharpest tool in the shed. Maybe one day he’ll level up enough to evolve. I could just see that moment.

ASH has reached level 13. What’s this?! ASH is EVOLVING? *Pokèmon evolution music plays*

ASH has EVOLVED into TEENAGE ASH!

ASH has learned ANGST!

Wouldn’t that be cool if humans were like Pokèmon? If someone bullies us at school we could just go into a Pokèmon battle.

Enemy GARY uses PEER PRESSURE! It’s SUPER EFFECTIVE!

ASH uses YO MAMA JOKE!

Enemy GARY has fainted.

I could just see the equivalent of the evolution stones (like the moon stone or grass stone).

MOM uses COLLEGE DEGREE on ASH! ASH EVOVES into MIDDLE-AGE ASH!

Now, you’re probably thinking, “But then we’d all go around saying only our names,” but we’ve seen that Pokèmon understand each other. So…maybe we aren’t really speaking English or Spanish. Maybe to an outside species, like a dog or cat, we are just standing around saying our names in various ways. Maybe if aliens visited we’d just be standing around going, “Bob. Bob. Bobby. Rob.” “Sam. Sam-mantha. Sam Andrews.” (or just “Human. Hu. Human.”) To us dogs just go “bark” with different variations.

Kind of blows your mind, doesn’t it.

Hmm…maybe all we need to do to use THUNDERBOLT is to shout out our name. “P-eee-ttt-er Wil-BROOK!!!” Then again, who knows what Pikachu is shouting when he says, “Pi-ka-CHUUU!!” It could be “Thunderbolt!” or “I like chili dogs!”

What four Pokèmon powers/moves would you like? (Because they can remember four moves.)

Now I’m off to ponder why Ash talks about Pikachu being his best friend yet he hasn’t given him a nickname. Hmm, maybe Pikachu doesn’t want one. What would Pikachu’s name be? Ryan? Deadpool? (I smell a Detective Pickachu meme brewing.)


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Cowards? | Scooby Doo and the Gourmet Ghost

May contain spoilers.

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I was watching Scooby Doo and the Gourmet Ghost when about 50-60 minutes in Shaggy said something interesting. He was talking to Scooby and said (I’m paraphrasing) that once again, pretending to be cowards landed them the easy assignments. What?! I rewound the video and listened again. I even put on subtitles. Shaggy indeed said “pretending to be cowards.” My mind was blown.

What’s next? You guys don’t really like Scooby Snacks? But me thinking about them not liking Scooby Snacks led me down a dark rabbit hole.

Suddenly, the whole series made more sense. Shaggy and Scooby pretend to be cowards and they get Scooby Snacks; what a hustle. Also, the ghost always coming after Scooby and Shaggy made sense; it’s karma for all their ploys. I also began to wonder if Fred (maybe one of the others) suspects or knows, and this is why Fred always has Scooby and Shaggy be the bait for the ghost traps.

Earlier in the movie, the gang have to cook their own meals. Shaggy and Scooby say they have to leave so that they can help another chef with their class (which in true comical fashion is the truth). Fred, I think, says to them (again paraphrasing), “You two will say anything to get out of work.” Again, makes me think one of them at least suspects that Scooby and Shaggy aren’t cowards.

Although, I don’t know if Scooby is pretending. I don’t remember him agreeing with Shaggy–I was too stunned by Shaggy’s line and the ghost floating by the window. Maybe Scooby isn’t pretending.

At first, I thought Shaggy was just referring to that instance and all the other times they were really scared, but why did he say, “once again.” Logic says they (or at least Shaggy) has done it before. This could mean he’s done it before but only in this movie. He doesn’t say, “like always.”

Now that’s out of the way, let me take off my tinfoil hat.

I really enjoyed the movie. It was a classic Scooby adventure full of humor and fun. But, it made me feel sorry for the gang if they ever do a family tree. They always seem to have some uncle or cousin that invites them somewhere. Just how big are Fred, Daphne, Shaggy, and Velma’s families?

Ugh, I’m doing it again.

Anyway, the movie was great. I highly recommended it to any Scooby-Doo fan.


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