The following is a modern take on the story The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.
There once was a young beauty both vain and popular, who needed everyone to know how wonderful she was. Everyday, she took out her phone and said, “Iggy, Iggy, in my phone, who’s the grandest of them all?”
The A.I. being a smart phone always answered, “You are, my queen.”
Then one day, a new photo app hit the map. Everyone buzzed about the new product from Blue Light Technologies. With the app, Donna could be forever young and beautiful. All the ravages of time and life would disappear. Age, worry, regret, and sin would all be transferred into her selfie. The only requirement was to admire the selfie and share it. For as long as the selfie was viral, she would remain young and vital.
< Easy enough for a beauty such as I, > thought Donna Green.
She snapped the pic. It indeed was glorious. It looked altered, but it was not–at least to her knowledge.
“This’ll do,” she said passively with a smirk, pretending that it was just another pic.
She shared it on all her socials. While she waited for the peasants to rejoice in her glory, she stared into the selfie. She did feel lighter. Though she buried it well, you can’t completely hide from the ill you bring…until now. Every snide comment, every mocking tone, every trick and mental game went into the selfie.
As expected, the selfie went viral. People commented on how wonderful she looked.
Donna smiled for she knew she was perfect. “Of course, of course,” she said waving to an imaginary audience, “it was cake.”
Each morning Donna posted the selfie and each night she lovingly caressed the phone that held the photo.
“My precious,” she whispered night after night.
No one grew tired of the selfie. No one mocked it. No one trolled or hated it. No one made memes about it. Everyone loved and shared it, even if it was the same picture.
As for Donna, she remained her vitriolic self, maybe worse than before, because each night any wrongdoing was transferred into the selfie. No matter how vile she became, the people loved and adored her just the same. They worshipped their social media queen even though all she did was post the same selfie time and again.
Donna’s 15 minutes of fame became 15 days then 15 weeks then 15 months then 15 years. Her reign of social media adulation lasted 996 years. In that time, you’d think she would end world hunger or bring peace to the world…or at the very least hold the door open for a pregnant woman carrying an armload of grocery bags. Nope. The only thing she ever did was cherish the selfie and share it.
The only thing she gained in the some 1,012 years of her life was an ego the size of a galaxy (and not a small one too). She no longer saw herself as a queen; she fancied herself a god.
< No, > thought Donna Green, < greater than a god. >
Then one day, as she did for eons, she asked her phone, “Iggy, Iggy, in my phone, who’s the grandest of them all?”
This time the A.I. answered, “I cannot lie. It ain’t you, honey pie. The contract is void, and your time is overdue. So, toodle-oo.”
In her hubris, she decided she no longer needed the app. She was radiant; she needed no help. She was hypertheos, a super-god.
But as the Iggy A.I. went silent, she realized her mistake. She opened her photos. The selfie was gone, deleted some time ago. It could not be recovered, even by the best. In its place was a new one, sans app, taken an hour ago.
She hurried and checked her social standing. The new selfie was largely ignored. The only ones interested were haters and bots, who sold moon colony lots. Her fans had blocked her. Her account was soon locked for breaking community rules.
Donna wailed and howled at her self-made demise. With no selfie to hold in her sin, it came back tenfold. In a second, every misdeed, every worry or regret, came back to Donna with every year lived added.
Her anguish became fear as year after year was added to her mortal coil.
Soon, nothing remained of old Donna Green, not even a file.
Thanks for reading!
Please consider buying one of my books. The Doctor Will See You Now releases March 25, 2026. You can get the preorder of the ebook for $0.99.
Joe Rover 
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