Terror of a Salesman | Writing Warm-up

Just for fun warm-up; isn’t heavily edited. If you want to do your own warm-up, you can use the prompt SALESMAN.

Writing warm-up begins in 3, 2, 1…

Fred, the door-to-door salesman, made a terrible mistake by ringing the doorbell of Mack Orbits. Orbits appeared at the doorway like a specter, a red liquid splattered across his face. The liquid also stained Mack Orbits’s dark clothes.

Fred stepped backwards watching the liquid fall from Orbits’s fingertips.

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

“Is there a problem?” asked Mack Orbits. He motioned towards a canvas just inside the home. The painting consisted of wild splatters of red paint. “I was just finishing up.”

Fred sighed in relief; his tense shoulders relaxed. Orbits invited the salesman in for coffee stating he would like to paint him. Fred nodded, entered, and the door slowly creaked closed behind him.

Not much is known about what happened next except that Fred was never seen again, but Mack Orbits’s painting of a terrified door-to-door salesman cowering in the corner became one of his most well known pieces.

The critics all loved the realism of it.

Until the next wormhole…thanks for reading.


The adventures continue in the Dogboy Universe

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Twitter Tale

*Cue spooky storytelling music*

A few days ago, I got on to Twitter to check my feed. One person I follow made jokes about the Area 51 Raid, like pretty much everyone is (including me), and I hit the like button on a couple of the posts.

About five minutes after doing this, Twitter locked my account. I then got the call for the activation code. The call went something like this, “Your activation code is: *static* 9 *static* 1 *static* 3.”

I hung up in order to try again. The same thing happened. I kept getting static but this time the call started adding letters; it said something like “Bravo *static* 9 *static* Linux…” I thought, “Since when did Twitter start doing letters?” The call then ended saying, “Call Failure.”

Since they said “Linux,” I thought it might be a tutorial on how to unlock your account if you use a Linux operating system. But…that still seemed odd.

I tried again and it just said, “Call Failure.” I went to another area because it must have been bad cell phone reception. One again, I got, “Your activation code is: 1 *static* 5 *static* Linux *static*” and then it went to call failure.

At this point, I jokingly thought, “What? Are the Area 51 aliens trying to contact me through Twitter? I guess  everyone does have a Twitter account now.”

Later that night, I saw a trailer for a movie about government stations that give out orders through numbers (the trailer called them “number stations”) and when the actress that played the operator spoke the numbers, it sounded similar to the calls I was getting. The voice on the activation call didn’t sound completely automated. It was like the actress in the trailer: live but trying to speak really clearly and almost robotic.

In all seriousness, it was probably bad cell reception or maybe “crossed wires.” Either way, a day later, I was able to get my account unlocked. I tried the call again and the activation code–with no letters–was just fine.

What about you. Do you think aliens (or possibly the government) were behind the calls or do you think that it was just bad cell reception? Have you ever gotten a Twitter activation code with letters? What do you think about the Area 51 Raid? Just a joke by someone in order to get likes or an attempt by Area 51 to dish out disinformation? Let me know in the comments section.

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Until the next wormhole…thanks for reading.


Only a few more days left in the Smashwords July sale. My eBooks will be going off sale on July 31.