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Joe Rover

Clean Fantasy Books

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  • The D-Team

    George always suspected that the other shoemakers didn’t like him; that’s why he was surprised when they hired shoemaking elves to help him in the upcoming contest. However, after seeing the D-List elves they paid for—they didn’t know the difference between a sole and a tongue—George was sure the others didn’t like him. — read more

    Jan 17, 2022
  • Fun Fact: Furryland (2)

    Before settling on “Live the Adventure” as Furryland’s motto/tagline, the employees went through many ideas. Some of the scrapped ideas include: “The least dangerous location in the Omniverse.” “Our rides only look dangerous.” “Phantasmic fun for the whole family.” “We’re less evil than the other guys.” “We’re not a monopoly!” “Once you’re here you’ll never… — read more

    Dec 15, 2021
  • Fun Fact: Furryland (1)

    Fun Fact: Furryland, since it stands for Fantastic Ultra-Real Rides Yahoo, was originally written as FURRYland. This idea was quickly scrapped as workers realized what a pain it was to write it in that style. Also, it looks weird. — read more

    Dec 8, 2021
  • The Mystery of Roanoke

    The colony of Roanoke disappeared after finding and fiddling with a reality gate. The gate transported the people to another reality (CROATOAN, left by one of the “survivors,” is the coordinates of the world—unfortunately, they failed to write it correctly, so we don’t know if it’s CRO-AT-OAN, CR-OATO-AN, or one of a billion other combinations).… — read more

    Nov 17, 2021
  • A Brief History of Atlantis

    It wasn’t completely the fault of the citizens of Atlantis that their flying city sunk. Monster hunters one day arrived and began sowing dissension among the people. Riots led to the destruction of the techno-magic engine that allowed the city to fly. The city crashed then sank into the sea. The phantasmic energy leak from… — read more

    Nov 16, 2021
  • A Brief History of the Sky Cities

    The sky cities, such as Atlantis, El Dorado, Shangri-La, and many others, were floating cities powered by techno-magic engines powered by phantasmic energy. The phantasmic energy was fueled by the people’s community spirit. As long as the people were kind & supportive to each other, the city would continue to fly & prosper. — read more

    Nov 16, 2021
  • The Slime (A Halloween Poem)

    It just wouldn’t be Halloween without a “The Raven” by Edgar Allan Poe inspired/parodied poem. Once upon a midday bleak and boring, While I exercised, only thoughts in that hour, There came a knocking at my spaceship door. “How is that possible?” I wondered. “Was an asteroid and nothing more.” Oh, asteroid, I cursed my… — read more

    Oct 31, 2021
  • Meet the Cast: La-Zar

    Little is known about La-Zar because they don’t speak and don’t remove their uniform/costume. Being a masked alien, we don’t know if they are male, female, or something else, and they seem uninterested in telling. We do know that La-Zar was trained by the ninja monks of Planet Bob. The monks took a vow of… — read more

    Oct 27, 2021
  • Meet the Cast: Brood

    Brood is a reformed/repentant vampire. Being a reformed vampire means he can go out in the daytime and cast a reflection. He still has problems with garlic and stakes. He is also weak to dark-light and unholy water. Though he looks to be 17 years old, he is much older. No one knows for sure,… — read more

    Oct 26, 2021
  • Meet the Cast: Glop

    Glop was discovered by gator researchers in the Florida swamps and named Randy. The researchers went on to raise the abandoned/orphaned swamp monster as their own. They provided him with basic skills, language, and a pair of red swim trunks that he still wears today. Not the same pair, obviously; they bought him multiple pairs… — read more

    Oct 26, 2021
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